Wanna feel young? Spend a week in a retirement community near Boca Raton with your 86-year-old father-in-law. When he starts a sentence with “Back when I was in my 60s…” you will be like “OMG I have so much time ahead of me. What was I thinking?” If possible, time your visit to occur during…
Deep Breaths and Banana Muffins
At some point, I’ll let go and enjoy my golden years and gray hairs. The growing resemblance between My Face and The Grand Canyon will magically cease to bother me and I will actively look forward to a small, cold salad for dinner. At 4pm.
Until then, I’ll be cooking my ass off, desperate to outpace this feeling that I’m eroding faster than the jersey shore and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.